Sunday, April 7, 2013

blank pages.

inspiration: those moments of waiting.

at some point or another, you've had to wait for something.
maybe that something was big.
maybe it was small.

im a pretty impatient person.
i don't like waiting.

but something that i'm constantly being remind of is that even though i'm waiting. God has a plan.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
    neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
As the heavens are higher than the earth,
   so are my ways higher than your ways
    and my thoughts than your thoughts.
-Isaiah 55:8-9

this is a scripture i've been wrestling with for a while.
what are God's ways and thoughts for me?

a few years ago, i learned what the blank pages between the old testament and new testament meant. right now, i have a huge ESV study bible, so the pages in between the OT and NT are filled with historical context. i also have a smaller NIV bible that now resides on my desk at work (i've found that if i start my day and meditate throughout the day on the Word of God, that i'm much less stressed :))

but the blank pages.
they represent waiting.
the Israelites waited for 400 years for the promised Messiah. 

400 years?!
i can't even wait patiently for 400 minutes!

but God had a promise and purpose to fulfill. but He was going to do it on His timetable. and in His way.

the people expected the Messiah to come in and take over through military power and to free them from slavery. but instead, He came into the scene in the most humble way possible - born in a stable. He didn't overthrow the Roman government. He surrendered to them and was crucified. but the story doesn't end there. Jesus overcame the grave. He was resurrected from the dead.

God's ways were different than anything they ever expected.
on a different timetable than they every expected.

i'm in that same place right now.
i'm waiting.
and hoping.
and praying for God to come through.

this time in three months, i will be in Kenya. i'm praying that the pages of that journey will be filled with wonder and joy and amazement at God's plans.
but right now, the pages seem blank.
i desire so greatly to hear God speaking to me.

i'm in a season where i'm yearning for more.
i've realized that in a lot of ways, i've grown comfortable.
i'm comfortable in my job.
in my relationships with friends.
in my relationship with God.

i'm in a season of waiting.
waiting for God to open doors.
waiting for God to do "immeasurably more".
waiting for God to answer the cries of my heart.

if i'm honest, i want to marry my best friend.
i want to have my mission trip funded.
i want to get out of debt.

and i know that God is going to provide in all these areas.
i know that God is going to use these seemingly "blank pages" in my story to do something greater for His kingdom.

what does this mean?
it means that i have to be the best friend to Holden that i can be.
it means that i have to think of him rather than only thinking of myself in our relationship.
it means that i may not get married, or engaged, for that matter for years.
it means that i may have to pray harder, eat out less, drive fewer places.
it means that i have to trust God.

the blank pages of waiting have the same impact as the pages with words.
i'm proclaiming that over myself right now.
i want God's full blessing over my life.

it means trusting Him, even in the waiting moments.
it means believing that He will come through, even in the trying moments.
it means praising Him, even when i can't see Him.

are you in a season filled with "blank pages"?
what are you waiting for?

be encouraged that God has a plan and purpose for you :)
Jeremiah 29:11

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