last night, i went to the last service of 2012 at Seacoast Church.
we had a guest speaker, Naaem Fazal from Mosaic Church and he gave a powerful message about how to start 2013 off in the right way.
- Reconcile your past --> don't dwell on the past, but begin to move forward
- Engaging the present --> don't just wait around for life to happen, truly engage in where God has you now
- Create your future --> accept the promises of hope and a future from God
now to back up a little bit...
i've been struggling with where i am for a while now.
in my relationship with God and in my relationship with Holden, i've fallen into the "comparison trap"; but for the last two weeks, i've heard the same message over and over and over and over again:
Don't define success by your expectations, define it by God's promises.
Don't just let life happen while you wait for the next big thing, bloom where you are planted now and you will reap a great harvest down the road.
in all honesty, when Holden and i began dating a few months back, when i dreamed about what our future would look like, it is far different than what it is now. in a lot of ways, it's better than what i imagined, but in a lot of ways, it's still not where i want it to be.
one of my best friends from college, Kelsey, got engaged over Christmas!!
but if i'm honest, for a while, i was jealous: it wasn't fair that it wasn't me.
but after confessing my feelings to Holden, Kelsey, and a few other close friends, it became easier to grasp that God's plan for Kelsey wasn't what God has planned for me either.
last night, Naaem gave a sermon about the Israelites being sent to Babylon and how Jeremiah had heard from God:
Build houses and live in them; plant gardens and eat their produce. Take wives and have sons and daughters; take wives for your sons, and give your daughters in marriage, that they may bear sons and daughters; multiply there, and do not decrease. -Jeremiah 29:5-6one phrase that my old small group leader and current life mentor always told me:
Bloom where you are planted.
and that's exactly what Jeremiah was telling the Israelites: live life. don't dwell. move forward. prosper.
for me, this means realizing who I am in Christ and proclaiming a promise that God has for me: that He has a plan for me - plans of hope and a future.
this means embracing God's plan for ME, not Kelsey, not anyone else, but for ME!
this means not waiting around until i get what i want from God, but living life to the fullest now because i may never get what i want.
this means turning my face upward toward God instead of outward towards the world and trusting fully in Him!
and this is my prayer for 2013.
that i will continue to move forward in my relationship with God first and foremost until the time comes for holden and i to pursue a walk together as one toward him. i've fallen away from that and definitely need to be replanted and pruned so that i can grow healthier and stronger.
i'm not where i thought i'd be in that regard.
but i will bloom where i am planted and move forward proclaiming boldly the promises of God.