Thursday, February 9, 2012

first things first.

inspiration: an impatient asian waiting for God's best.

this is the first blog in a while that i haven't written directly pertaining to a sermon.
i kind of like just freestylin' it, but while i feel light-hearted about my blogging style, it's time for me to get serious for a moment.

*cue dimming lights and dramatic entrance music*

two of my good friends posted blogs today regarding relationships and putting God first.
two of the things i struggle with most...
Allison: Proud to be a single peacock
Ashley: Drowning in a Sea of Uncertainty

i heard a pastor recently say "Put God first and everything else will fall into place".
easy concept, right? right.
easy to put into practice, right? well......

i began a year of not dating in may 2011 - a year for me to focus solely on becoming a godly woman and pursuing God first and foremost in my life. it was hard in the beginning to not focus on guys, but as i drew closer to Christ and looked for God to fill me rather than attention from a guy, i was able to become a better leader, better friend, better servant of God.

but lately, my relationship with God has slipped spots in priority.
i allowed friendships to overshadow the most important relationship of all and i've been slipping ever since. i confessed this to some of my small group girls earlier tonight and i'm blessed to have them as accountability partners in my life. even though we're all in different places in life, relationally, emotionally, and spiritually, i'm blessed to have sisters who encourage me, even when i stumble or turn away from my true calling.

i know that God will be faithful in blessing me with a godly man.
but i know i need to be a godly woman.
sure, i spend time in God's word and i'm being more intentional about studying and learning more about God and His promises.
sure, i serve at theWell and greet people and connect with people.
sure, i lead a women's small group.
sure, i tithe.

all these things are good.
but without God being the forerunner of these things, i am doing all this for the wrong reason.

God needs to be first in my life, not because i want blessings from Him.
God needs to be first in my life because he deserves to be first in my life.
"A woman with a pure heart for God does not focus on what He gives, but delights in who He is. She seeks His face, not just His hand." -Lady in Waiting
...and if i'm being honest, i've been seeking God's hand far too much recently.
i've asked for His blessings because i want to be rewarded rather than asking for Him knowing that i need Him.

i know that the goal of my year commitment isn't to say "okay, now i'm ready to date" and to begin pursuing the first guy who asks me out. it's really hard to pull away from that mindset, especially when someone is in your life. but i know that if this person is who God wants me to be with, no matter how long the wait or how hard the journey, he will be there. and if it's not who God wants me to be with, then i have to trust in His plans for me and walk in faith and obedience. after all, that's what we're called commanded to do, right?

so first things first.
God is first.
everything else will fall into its proper place afterwards.

Jonny Sharp preached a message of hope last week.
and we know because of the Gospel that God keeps His promises.
He is always faithful.
I believe that.
So now I have to start living that.

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