Tuesday, September 28, 2010

greater things.

inspiration: "Greater things have yet to come..."

i am so blessed.
with friendships that are growing and thriving.
with opportunities that God is placing before me.
with a church that i get to serve every weekend.
with Christ's love surrounding me, even when i fall.

:)

great blessings:

-babysitting opportunities (finances have been a struggle for me, lately. i've been praying about ways to make a little more money and to find ways to be a better steward of my money. i got to babysit Friday night and last night, which on top of the weekly paycheck i get from Mary's is allowing me to have spending money throughout the week, which is definitely a blessing)

-internship is going great (this morning, i finished the database project that Brad and i have been working on. my supervisor and another guy were very impressed with the work that we did and i'm really glad -- that thing really stressed and overwhelmed me greatly when we first started it. i think, if given the opportunity, i'm going to continue doing other ventures related to the database. i was told there would be a lot more to learn and take on, but i'm ready for the challenge!)

-possible careers at APSU (granted, this is a very gray situation and it all comes down to what other career options present themselves between now and december, but there are two IT-related positions at APSU right now. both have been posted for several months now...i reallllly would love to have one of those positions, but, of course, we will have to see how everything plays out :))

-donating my hair to Locks of Love (i made my appointment today to have my hair cut on November 4th! i'm super nervous and super excited at the same time. it's just hair and it'll grow back out, but i'm nervous about having short hair...

-kelsey and krissy are running my 10K with me on October 23rd! it'll be a different experiencing running here in clarksville and running with friends (seeing as i've had to travel and run alone for all my previous races -- which is fine, i kind of like doing things alone -- but i'm super excited to have friends not only run with me but also to have people there to support me personally! :D


greater things are before me.
and i know that greater things are coming, too :D
Jesus is blessing me immensely! Life is good.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

unselfish.

inspiration: i want to be less selfish.

i just had a moment of sadness; not for myself, but about myself. i realized how truly selfish i am sometimes and how it keeps me from being truly HAPPY about everything else that God has blessed me with.

i want to be a friend.
but more than that, i want to be a good friend.
i love supporting my friends and being an encourager and a cheerleader and a fan. i LOVE it! i love when people delight in me and support me and are good friends.
but i think sometimes i expect too much for people to be my biggest fans, my best friends, and my encouragement, too. and when my expectations aren't met, i get disappointed and even jealous and hurt.


Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom. But if you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth. Such "wisdom" does not come down from heaven but is earthly, unspiritual, of the devil. For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.
-James 3:13-16



I don't want to allow the devil to have a foothold in my life. I don't want to have a jealous and selfish heart; i want to have a servant's heart that is full of humility and love. There is nothing loving or Christ-like about jealous and selfish motives.


Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus:
-Philippians 2:3-5


I love my friends and I want to be good friend to them.
And I want to be delighted in and praised, but not because of what I do, but because of what Christ is doing through me.



On a side note, I feel like this is probably why relationships aren't going my way either; I'm too focused on what I can get out of one, rather than what I can bring to the table for Christ. I feel like as soon as I let go of my expectations and start trusting in the plans and the person God has created for me, I will be far better off than the crazy, deranged worry-wart I am now. Right now, I'm afraid I won't ever be "treasured", but it's not about what a guy sees in me; it should be about how he sees Christ in my heart and in my life.

after all, a woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should be seeking Him to find her. ;) (one of my favorite quotes ever :))

amazing :)

inspiration: life is good.

life is really good :D
Jesus blesses me so much :D

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

cleared for graduation.

inspiration: graduation email.

yesterday, i took my Senior Exit Exam as required by the University to graduate in December. and today, i got my "cleared for graduation" e-mail that stated that as long as i pass this semester, i will be able to graduate December 17, 2010! :D :D

i'm so excited about this.
i'm genuinely excited about all the opportunities that are ahead :)
excited. and also terrified (as i have expressed in many other blog posts).

and lately Matthew 5:14 has really been on my heart.
"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden."

am i really shining a light for Christ?
or is my "city on a hill" my selfishness?
i certainly hope it's the former rather than the latter.

i pray that i am shining a light for Christ.
verses 15 and 16 go on to state: "Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."

i pray that in all my actions that i am glorifying Christ through my actions and words. i pray that even people who don't know me would be able to see the heart of Christ reflected through my daily life. i love Christ with all my heart and i strive to live a life that glorifies HIM above all else, even if it means forsaking the world and its pressures. if i am hiding Christ's light from the world, I am not doing myself or anyone else a favor. i pray that i would be strengthened by Christ to be in and not of the world.

with graduation and who-knows-what-else looming ahead, i pray for trust in Christ's plans for me; be it to stay here in Clarksville or to relocate or to be called to a different industry. i don't know what lies ahead for me. but i do know this:

"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me."-Philippians 4:13

:D

Sunday, September 19, 2010

matthew 5:14

inspiration: my devotional this morning.


"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden." -Matthew 5:14


i wrote this verse on the back of my hand today to remind myself that i need to be a light for Christ. in every aspect of my life, i need to strive to reflect the love of Christ.

i hope that my life is a reflection of Christ's love and that anyone who doesn't know me can at least see my heart and know that i am in love with Christ. if that is not the case, then I am not doing my part as a servant and daughter of Christ. if i am not basking in the promises of God and doing my part to honor Him, then i am not doing what i was created for.

i want to be a light.
i want to shine brightly for my God! :D

Saturday, September 18, 2010

correction and advice.

inspiration: my beautiful friend, Joyann and Proverbs 12

so i talked to my friend, joyann, tonight and was telling her about a certain situation regarding my ex-boyfriend. i didn't realize how much it would affect her when i told her, but it really upset her and it tore me apart, in addition to really catching me off guard.

she gave me advice that i absolutely did not want to hear. and my heart and emotions are telling me to just let what's supposed to happen, happen. but the rest of me telling me that she is right and i need to take her advice.

and right after i got off the phone with her, this was the status of my church:


Fools are headstrong and do what they like; wise people take advice. Proverbs 12:15


this situation definitely is not one that i want to deal with. if i were an ostrich, my head would be in the sand right now. and as retarded as i am being right now, i'm also being very honest.

and Proverbs 12 is absolutely kicking my butt.
i'm reading it and i'm just being convicted because i know what i need to do. and i just can't muster the strength to do it. it's going to cause more pain because i let my guard down. it's going to open old wounds because i let myself get emotionally attached again. it's going to stinkkkkkk because i really want it to be different. but i know that the heart is deceitful above all things and i need to guard it from anything that will take my focus away from Christ.

Friday, September 17, 2010

doing better.

inspiration: things have finally stopped overwhelming me.

two days ago, i was an emotional and mental wreck.
assignments. papers. work. internship. sleep. running. eating.
there was too much to do and too little time to do it.

but now, things have finally settled down :)

my internship is starting to get better. i'm still overwhelmed at times, but brad and i got the first part of our program running and it really feels like progress!! :D

all my assignments are done, turned in, and i don't have any "looming" work over the weekend (at least, i hope i don't)...

i'm dogsitting and i'm able to relax a little bit before another busy weekend!
tomorrow, i'm running another 5K, plus doing my first modeling class :) i'm super excited about spending another lovely day in Franklin :) i love that place a lot!

i pray that tomorrow goes well and that i continue to trust and walk with the Lord in complete obedience :)



Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;

in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make your paths straight.

-Proverbs 3:5-6


i pray for the future. i pray for myself and my future husband. i pray for my friends and family and for all our healths. i pray that i am able to fulfill whatever plans God has laid before me. i pray for more opportunities to live and shine in the fullness of Christ. it's not about me: it's about God's glory :)

"Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children" -Ephesians 5:1

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

holding steady.

inspiration: clinging to hope of God's greater plan.

we've been in class for a little over two weeks now, and i still have yet to find any sort of "groove". i've established that wednesdays are my longest and most tiring day, and other than that, all my days seem to just drag by and blur together.

i still worry and struggle with anxieties about the future (guys, jobs, money). i worry about not ever having a "good" relationship again (but, to be honest, i'm just trying to be okay with my singleness right now). i worry about graduation and not having a job; on top of that, i worry that i may have a job that i'm not good at, or that i won't find one i like. i worry about my finances and my parents' as well. the future and all its unknown variables just worry the mess out of me sometimes.
...but i am still clinging to the promises Christ has for me and the plans that lie ahead!!


Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.
-Philippians 4:8-9


i hope that in all areas of life, i am able to find strength and peace in Christ even when i am at war with the world and all the struggles and difficulties it brings.

Monday, September 13, 2010

still praying.

inspiration: different situations.

i'm caught in a place in various relationships where i feel like all i can do is pray. for people, for circumstances. i can't ever change people; i can only be a light for Christ to them; i can only pray for the Holy Spirit to move within them.

it saddens me because i want to do more for them, but it's not me that can change the inner being and thoughts of someone. that's God.


Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves. Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with God's people who are in need. Practice hospitality.
-Romans 12:9-13



Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
-Philippians 4:5-7

Friday, September 10, 2010

priorities.

inspiration: my devotional today.

last night and today, i've been struggling immensely with matters of the heart. i had dinner with my ex-boyfriend and best friend last night. and i was taken aback by the feelings i had toward my ex. i genuinely missed him as a friend; circumstances (distance, schedules, work, etc) in the past made it hard for us to really spend time together a lot and a lot of things happened that strained our relationship and pretty much tore us apart.

but last night, things were different. after not seeing him or talking to him very much over the last few months, i had built up barriers to my heart. i had convinced myself that i was going to have to keep my guard up over dinner; i was going to have to defend myself; i was going to have to just stand up for myself and not be too emotional. but the circumstances of dinner and the fact that we were all just having fun and being laid back made all of those barriers and worries crumble. and of course, being the emotionally-driven person i am, i let myself caught up in thoughts and emotions of the past.

luckily, my ex made a point to make it very clear that nothing could or would happen between us again (he always was such a logical person). and i know that (but like i said, i'm very emotion driven). we have two separate lives and we're going two seemingly different directions in life. it really would not work out, at least not by our own accord.

but today, i've just been battling my emotions. i've been battling myself and battling looking forward rather than backwards. i've longed for this relationship that isn't ideal, rather than trusting in God to provide the ideal relationship in the future.

my devotional highlighted 1 Corinthians 7:32
"I want you to live as free of complications as possible. When you're unmarried, you're free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master." (MSG)

while, i'm not concerned about marriage, per se, i am worried about my priorities. i've been so consumed with wanting a relationship (and especially since last night) that i haven't been concerned about pleasing God.

"A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek Him first to find her." -Maya Angelou

i'm struggling and needing prayer to just keep my priority and obedience to Christ first and foremost. when i am doing that and when i have my sights set solely on Him, i won't worry about anything else; I will only be concerned with serving Him.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

overwhelmed: understatement of the year.

inspiration: this week thus far.

so yesterday, i started my internship with Ingersoll-Rand. it went pretty well. there wasn't a lot to do, seeing as it was my first day. but i think i will definitely learn a lot and get to experience the "real world" some and i'm excited about those opportunities.

but when i left, the thought hit me: "do i really want to do this?" and the answer is Yes. i absolutely know this. i've worked hard for the last three years. graduation is impossibly close. i've been granted this amazing gift from God. and i enjoy it.

but i battled thoughts of "what if you're not good at it? what if i realize after graduation that this isn't what i enjoy doing?" and all day yesterday, i battled these thoughts. i encountered various other stressful situations (in which, under normal circumstances, i never would've freaked out about), but yesterday and this morning were both just incredibly stressful times.

this afternoon got a lot better and i praise God for allowing me to experience such a wonderful and uplifting afternoon in the midst of, what will probably become, "near-graduation-the-real-world-is-looming-just-head crisis". but right now, i stand strong in the promises that God will provide in all circumstances for me.

If He is calling me to do something else, i know He will let me know on His timetable His plans for me. He promises to never leave nor forsake me. I am reminded heavily of His presence through the song "Everything Falls" by Fee.



"When everything falls apart, Your arms hold me together.
When everything falls apart, You're the only Hope for this heart.
When everything falls apart and my strength is gone, I find You mighty and strong. You keep holding on.
You keep holding on."

Even in the midst of my turmoil and struggle to discern God's will for my life, I know that He will hold me together and ultimately use me in the ways He has planned and destined me for.

I ask if you're still reading this that you would continue to pray for me as well. I don't know what the future holds for me, but I pray for God's strength and love to carry me through all the days where I feel overwhelmed.


"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?"

"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

--Matthew 6:25-34


I will strive to not worry about tomorrow. I pray for God's peace and strength to overtake me and to surround me as I finish my last semester, work in my internship, and begin living life.

Monday, September 6, 2010

tetris.

inspiration: Tetris. Change. Life.

Last night was our first night back at the Denley's for Sunday Night Small Group (SNSG). I'm SOO glad to be back in the swing of things. My Sunday's are always eventful and now I get to add SNSG back to my agenda! Love it!

We talked about change last night. And how a lot of us are about to graduate college (or have already graduated) and how we don't know what to expect (myself DEFINITELY included in this category). We all kind of expect certain things to happen once we have that "college degree", but sometimes life doesn't turn out that way. So how do we deal with unexpected things? How do we deal with life when it's not going our way or when things are nothing like we expected them to be??

Now for a metaphor.



I grew up addicted to Tetris.
I had an old school Nintendo Game Boy and for the first like six or seven years of my life, Tetris was the only game I had. And I rocked at it.
I decided earlier that I wanted to play it on my computer again. So I found an online version (not as intriguing as the original, but Tetris nonetheless) and I proceeded to play for about 30 minutes.

We all know how it goes: We try to prevent "holes" in our set up. We manipulate our pieces to create a wall with a gap on the end and we wait for the straight bar to come so we can drop it and remove 4 rows (the ultimate Tetris move).

We live life the same way. We try to manipulate everything into perfection (at least, I do). We try to plan everything. There's a place for everything and everything should be in it's place. I am completely guilty of trying to control every aspect of my life.

But what happens when things don't go the way we plan? What happens when that straight bar doesn't come and our wall gets taller and taller with no apparent solution in sight? Or worse what happens when we have a "tetris fail" moment (like in the picture) and we've missed the opportunity we've been waiting for?

Life is full of these moments.
Life is full of uncertain times.
Life is full of unexpected events and unpredictable circumstances.

But no matter what, I cling to the truth that God is always with me.
Joshua 1:9 states, "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."

Philippians 4:13 states, "I can do everything through him who gives me strength" and verse 19 states, "And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus."

It's easy to remain faithful to God when things are all good. When we remove those 4 rows, it's very easy to celebrate. The times when we mess up and create "holes" in our wall, or when we never get that coveted straight bar, it's a little more difficult to praise God. But even through the times where "the straight bar doesn't come" and we are unsure of what the future holds, we should always hold fast to the promise that God will never leave us or forsake us, he will strengthen us, and he will provide for us. In all circumstances, God is good. So while I have no clue where I will be in a few months, I do know that as long as I remain faithful to Christ, He will lead me where He wants me; I will follow faithfully.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

awesome.

inspiration: "Today is the day You have made. I will rejoice and be glad in it."

I'm so blessed and so thankful for the wonderful days I've been experiencing.
I have an absolutely amazing community of people surrounding me and supporting me in my walk with Christ and in my daily walk of life.
I am constantly blessed with more than I deserve.

God's grace is good :)
His love is amazing :)
And everything about my life, right now, is awesome!
I know hard times are inevitable, but right now, I am rejoicing in the absolute awesomeness of life, right now and rejoicing in Christ's blessings upon me :)


Two quotes from today. My friends are made of pure awesome:

Heather: They need to make asian-sized shirts.
Me: They do. They're called kids sizes.

Heather: The guy playing the acoustic guitar is the worship pastor from my church back at home.
Kelsey: Heather, I have no idea what acoustic even means.
*Heather shuns Kelsey*

Friday, September 3, 2010

a blog by heather.

inspiration: my beautiful friend, heather.

my friend heather wrote an awesome blog earlier. i am proud/honored to be able to share some of these guys as my brothers in Christ as well. :)

but it truly is refreshing and encouraging to know that there are true godly men surrounding myself and my friends. and i have to agree 100% that the most attractive thing a man could ever do is love Jesus with all his heart.

http://hmkennedy.blogspot.com/2010/09/to-my-brothers-in-christ-this-is-for.html

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

mulligans, vases, and cardboard.

inspiration: Jesus is definitely moving at APSU!!

NOTE: It's way past my bed time (no, really. under normal circumstances, i would've been in bed and asleep for about an hour-and-a-half now), so forgive any spelling/grammar mistakes and discombobulated thoughts...

So what's up with the title? Three unrelated things. But they came together to help present the amazing Gospel: Christ's unfailing and unconditional love!
Tonight was the first night of the Fall 2010 AQUA gatherings and lemme just say: AMAZING!

I wish I could give you a play-by-play-in-words of everything that happened, but frankly I'm too tired to do that and it would all come down to the same thing: God's love is unconditional, unchanging, incredibly, and powerful!

What I will do is break down the three elements listed in the title:

  1. Mulligans

  2. It's basically a "do-over" in golf. So, if you make a bad shot, you can redo it. (I learned this tonight from Brandon, who apparently is a golfer...Really shocked me there, I seriously thought he was built for football ;))
    In our lives and walks with God, we make mistakes. But we get mulligans (I guess you "get" a mulligan...I'm not a golfer, therefore, I'm not sure what the correct verb would be for this...) constantly. We were born in sin, we commit sins probably daily, and biblically speaking, sin is equivalent to death.
    But because of Jesus and His death on the Cross, our sin is taken away. We are redeemed from our sin and given new life through Christ. We get a do-over. Our sin is no more!


    You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
    --Romans 5:6-8 (NIV)


  3. Vases

  4. If you are not familiar with the story of the Prodigal Son, I encourage you HIGHLY to check it out: The Parable of the Lost Son

    Basically, the youngest of two sons asks for his father's inheritance (the social equivalent of saying "Dad, I wish you were dead so I could have your money" ... pretty rough thing to ask...). Then he leaves his family, packs up his things, and proceeds to squander his wealth in "wild living". He eventually hits rock bottom and has nowhere to go, no food to eat, so he gets hired as a servant. He is so desperate and starving that food he is feeding to pigs begins to look good to him. This son has, for real, hit the rocky bottom of all rock bottoms: He abandoned his family with his share of the inheritance, blew it all, and is now starving. He knew he had messed up, knew he wasn't worthy to be a part of the family, but wanted to "work his way back into the family" by becoming a hired hand...he wanted to be a servant to his family. he wanted to go back home.

    Brandon shared with us that in this situation, this would have been an incredibly embarrassing situation, not only for the family, but also for the community of people the "prodigal son" was around before. In those times, if the son returned, members of the community would fill vases up with garbage, rotting food, filthy trash and upon the son's return, would smash the vases at the boy's feet. (Brandon proceeded to smash a vase successfully to demonstrate his point. If the vase hadn't broken, I'm sure it would've been an awkward and embarrassing situation for him...)

    But the greatness of the story is that didn't happen!
    Upon his return, the boy's father RAN out to him and greeted him and kissed him. The father called for a celebration and feast for the son's return; this greatly angered his older brother, but the father's reply to the brother's rage was: "'My son,' the father said, 'you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.'" (Luke 15:31-32)

    This is the same love our Father in Heaven has for us.
    Even when we've abandoned Him, run away, squandered our lives and our money and our time indulging in worldly things that don't matter, and hit rock bottom, He still awaits for us to return home. He celebrates when we return home. He rejoices in our delight and return to Him.

    So now, not only do we get a mulligan. But we avoid vases of garbage being smashed at our feet. Instead, we experience grace and mercy and compassion. Sounds like a pretty awesome message, right? Oh, but there is more awesomeness that took place!

  5. Cardboard

  6. A few weeks ago, I was invited to be a part of Aqua's first "cardboard testimonies". The idea is to write on one side of cardboard a phrase/description of something we were before Christ. Mine was "Didn't Wait For True Love". But on the reverse side, we were to write something representing who we are now because of Christ. Mine said "Consumed by Christ's TRUE LOVE".

    We all make mistakes and we all have things in our pasts that we have to deal with. I made the mistake of giving myself away to someone who isn't my future husband. It was a horrible situation to deal with, but because of Christ's death on the cross and His infinite love, grace, compassion,etc. I have become a new creation! His LOVE defines me now! It took me a long time to "return home", but now that Christ has full 100% access to my heart and 100% influence in my life, I don't have to be ashamed of my past. Instead, I am a true reflection of a prodigal daughter. I strive to be a true image of Christ's love.

    It's amazing how freeing a cardboard sign can be.
    Because of mulligans, vases, and cardboard, I am on my way to being completely healed through Christ and His compassion and infinite love. :)



Brooke and myself holding our cardboard signs.
Christ-side up, of course :)
He is working magnificently in both of our lives.
I'm so glad she and I had the opportunity to use our past and our pain to represent Christ. This was definitely the beginning of a healing process for both of us and I know that when we trust in Christ for strength, He will build us up for His Kingdom :)


Once you were dead because of your disobedience and your many sins. You used to live in sin, just like the rest of the world, obeying the devil—the commander of the powers in the unseen world.[a] He is the spirit at work in the hearts of those who refuse to obey God. All of us used to live that way, following the passionate desires and inclinations of our sinful nature. By our very nature we were subject to God’s anger, just like everyone else.

But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!)
--Ephesians 2:1-5 (NLT)

if you want more Jesus: ask.

inspiration: i asked for Jesus: I GOT JESUS!!

a couple days ago, i felt so exhausted. physically, mentally, and spiritually.
i was missing a lot of Jesus in my life and i knew it. i blogged about it. i prayed about it. i made a conscious effort to praise Christ even though i was feeling a little insecure about my walk.

and now it's 48 hours later, i'm feeling Jesus EVERYWHERE.
through friendships, relationships, opportunities.

i asked for more Jesus and I GOT MORE JESUS!

The popular "Ask, Seek, Knock" references come to mind during times like this.


"Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.

"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets."

--Matthew 7:7-12


I needed more Jesus in my life. I needed comfort and love and grace and compassion. Not from anyone other than Jesus. I needed His healing, mercy, and love. And He came through for me when I needed Him to most.

I needed a devotional: He led to me to where I could find one; I went Monday night to Lifeway Christian Stores and found one that jumped out at me and has been encouraging me and lifting me up to Him daily; I needed friendship and laughter through a Christ-centered relationship: I got to talk to Heather last night about how much we both need good Christ-centered men in our lives to set an example for us. we talked about our burdens and struggles, and Jesus was just present during our conversation, offering healing and compassion and mercy; today, I had an interview with Ingersoll-Rand/Trane to do my internship with them for my final curriculum: God blessed me with the opportunity to jump-start my professional career! (I start next Tuesday and I'm super excited and extremely nervous); tonight, I will be worshiping with a ton of APSU students at AQUA! I just KNOW God is going to be massively present as we go through the events of tonight. He will bring healing to those of us who are broken, peace to those who are restless, and compassion to those who need a place to fit in.

I am reminded time and time again of the awesome majesty of Our Creator. He never leaves nor forsakes us. When we ask for Him, He answers. It's just a matter of asking.